Wish I could take your pain away!

Its been tough these past weeks for my family and I. At 4 weeks Isabella was already confined in the hospital as she had high fever. Then a few weeks after Noah got 40.6 degrees celsius fever and had to bring him to hospital twice. It turned out to be or is a middle ear inflammation. Now, to think it's all over and done with, our daughter is starting to cough. More than that, she is scheduled to have two vaccines tommorow, which therefore means she could also get fever yet again.

As adults we are all whiny and in pain when we are sick and so I don't want to even think and imagine what newborns and babies go through when they are sick. Especially for newborns for whom it is all new! The hardest thing to go through when you are a parent is seeing your child in pain or suffering. I'm sure any other parent would agree with me. You pray to God and wish that you can take away the pain. You even would compromise and you wish you were sick rather than them - they are still so small and fragile!

I majored in Biomedical Science so I more or less know how the body reacts to certain ailments, etc. But being a parent makes you feel helpless and you always want to look for assurance. The other day Noah sneezed out blood. From my medical background I would reason that this was due to the nose spray that dries up the nasal mucusoal lining. I would guess that the pressure from the sneezing would cause blood to also come out of the nose. But being a mother, I saw the blood, saw the confused look on my son's face and became worried. I had to act and so asked my husband to phone work to say he would be late as we were going to the hospital ASAP. Who cares if I have to wait in the emergency waiting room and if they take two seconds to look at him just to send us home again saying its nothing. At least I'm assured he is fine. At the end, I was right about the symptoms, but then went home with my child, reassured and with a light heart.

Every cough that hurts their chest, every cry after giving the supository medicine and when they shout 'no no don't' , that sniff that still doesn't allow your child to breathe through the nose properly - they are still so small how would they know how to breathe through their mouth? It hurts you so much!

Fact is, when our children are in pain, we parents are in more pain. It doesn't just have to be physical pain that our children go through for us parents to worry. In the future, our children will make mistakes and when they suffer, we will pain more. I realised we parents suffer more, because not only are our children in pain - it's worst to see your own flesh and blood suffering. Yet another quote I can relate to when my parents used to always say: 'I wish I could take away the pain from you'.

Can you relate?

You are a mother when ....

1. You multi-task without even realising that you are doing 5 things at one time.

1.Portioning milk with one hand

2.carrying your baby in the other

3.counting out loud the number of spoons of milk powder to keep him calm and entertained

4. at the same time picking up the car toy with your toes,

5. whilst with your mouth full trying to at least have a bite of your breakfast!

2. You wonder why you spend so much money on toys when your kid just plays with cardboard boxes, kitchen utensils or even the toilet paper roll!

3. You get by the day with improvisation. Once your kids gets more active you have to find new things to keep them busy. Even if it means giving them a cooking spoon and tupperware (you dom´t dare give them anything else but plastic material) for them to copy you whilst you cook. That will keep them busy for 5 minutes.

4. You run out of ideas as to how to not let your kids get near the computer without pulling all the CDs down, or how to keep them away from the bookshelf without pulling all the books down. Your own children challenge you and your starting to run out of ideas. These kids get cleverer by the day!

5. After being with your kids 24/7, you find it hard to communicate with other adults and realise your vocabulary is restricted. Your sentences are shorter and you have to think when you talk!

6. After you bring your kids to sleep you try to do the housework. Its amazing how many house chores you get done in an hour! Its as though your beating the clock trying to get everything done whilst they sleep. While you clean you think: ´Please don´t wake up. Please dont wake up! Once you have finished you sit down, make yourself a cup of tea thinking you have a minute for yourself and then.... ’wahhh wahhh’. One of them cries and they are awake.

7. ...or you don’t even get to do the house chores! Sod it! You are too dead beat and fall asleep next to them!

8. You keep on cleaning up and wonder why the appartment is still not clean! Sometimes you wonder – why do you even bother? Your kid only takes a few minutes to cause a tornado yet again!

9. You look around the appartment and realise how different it looks compared to a few years ago when it was just you and your husband. That tall flower vase by the computer is gone. Everything breakable is set higher for your kids not to reach and all else that you don`t want them to touch is squished into the stalk room and hid in the corner. Mind you, if you do attempt to hide things, it is just a matter of time till they find these things

10. You run after your kids the whole day and sound like a broken record. The only words that leave your mouth the whole day are: No! Dont! Stop! Oh my gosh!

11. You make a sigh of relief the moment you hear the door unlock. Your husband is home, praise God! Your so happy to see him – of course u missed him, but moreso: your happy because you´re tired of running after your kids the whole day! You love your children but there are times you just can’t keep up!

12 ...you look back and remember the times when you gave your parents a hard time and how your mother always said ` when you have your own children, you will realise how hard it is to be a parent and understand why we do the things we do. As children we used to hate it when our parents were right...but OH MY they were right about that one!

Despite all of the above, you bring them to sleep at night and can´t take your eyes off of them. You are amazed at how time flies and the strenguous day is forgotten. This gives you strength for the next day(s) that lie before you. They grow up way too fast and you are happy that they are active and alive. You can always look back and have many stories to tell! You just have got to love your children...your own flesh and blood!

I am a Mother

11:39 am - Classical music plays at the background, whilst my two children sleep. Isabella in her cradle swing and Noah snoring away on the sofa bed. Around this hour, I have `time` for myself. I write `time` in quotation marks as this time, whilst the children are sleeping – I use, or shall I say, `try` to use the time wisely by cleaning up the tornado my 17 month old son caused in a matter of only 2 hours of playing, portioning milk, washing the dishes, hanging up the washing, e.t.c. It`s amazing how much I can get done in 30 minutes. In my younger years I would have needed 3 hours to do the chores I do now within 30 minutes. Since the kid`s are still sleeping, I have time to finally blog.

I have been wanting to do my own blog in ages. Everyone has been starting blogs and I´ve envied them for it. Hopefully, I will find the time and patience to write as often as I can. This would probably mean that, in my free time, I will stalk less on facebook and play less of `Bejewelled Blitz`, which by the way is starting to get frustrating. I will never be able to rank number 1 in that game anyway.

I have always loved writing down my thoughts. It`s a way for me to clear my mind and break down my thoughts. It is like general cleaning. Once you´ve finished cleaning you feel so much lighter. It helps you clear your thoughts and feel you have achieved a lot for the day. It is the same with me and writing. I love to share my thoughts and in sharing my thoughts I also find myself. In being understood, I find I understand myself a bit more as well.

When I was a teenager, I wanted to start a diary, but didn`t dare as I was scared that my big brother would read it and embarass me by blurting out my secrets. Now, as I get older, what I write are not secrets anymore. I know most of the things I will blog about won`t be secrets anyway. All I write about, I am sure, any mother can and will relate to. That is why I shouldn`t be ashamed of anything. I know I will find other mothers who will understand me- and in return I will be reassured as a mother. Every mother is an individual, yet go through the same joys and pains.

Now, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Rebby Vie Precilla. I have been married to my husband Jerico for exactly 2 year and three months now! We married on a blessed day, mainly July 7, 2007 (07.07.2007). The date is magical and said to bring good luck and blessings. Truly it has! 2 years married and we have been blessed with two wonderful children. Our son Noah Joaquin is turning 17 months. We mostly call him Coby, from both our names JeriCo and RebBY. 1 year and 3 months later God blessed us with yet another beautiful baby girl – Isabella Angeline. We call her Izzie, yet there are many who call her Bella as well. She is now 7 weeks old. I feel so blessed. 10 years ago, I would have never thought that I would be married to a wonderful husband and have two beautiful children! It is not easy being a mother of two, indeed it is challenging, yet the fulfillment of being a mother and watching my children grow outweighs everything and brings me so much joy!

I am in awe of and am a fan of all mothers out there and this is why I am starting this blog for all mothers and to all mothers-to-be. In a way, also to all our men, so that they understand what we go through (lets see if I can get my husband to read my blogs too and see if I can get him to start blogging too). Or even, maybe, to all children so they understand why we are the way we are at times. Being a mother myself has made me understand my mother more now and indeed I feel closer to her now more than ever!

12:49-Time to stop blogging. Nearly after an hour, with a 20 minute interval of trying to bring Noah back to sleep (I was sure not to finish this blog in one sitting without being intervened), it`s Isabella`s turn. Praise God, Noah is still sleeping which gives me time to breast feed and bond with my daugther before her big brother starts running around and screaming.

Till my next blog. Thank you for reading my first entry!